Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
just to let you know, don't open your linen closet for a while until i come over with a cleaning kit and geek squad
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
They're fighting and it sounds intense. Cross your fingers for their demise
Toss in some raw meat and play heavy metal music. It will insight violence.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
Randomize
