Duck Duck Cougar?
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I can't be 100% sure of this but I think tonight was the first time I told a middle aged woman holding a baby to go fuck herself
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
I was "singing along to the Lego Movie" high. Everything was not awesome
My Sexting was not on an AP level
Had a dream we were competing for tomatos.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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