I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
he was so excited that he found the elusive clitoris. i was like look christopher colombus, just because you found it doesnt mean you knew what to do with it
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
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I forgot to tell you thank you for putting me out when I was on fire. im sure I'll laught about this someday...
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I just fucked her in her boyfriends bathroom... he was in the room sleeping.
Hoping to get a pic of me on the tractor with an erection for you one of these days.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
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I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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