I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Did you get my bra back of the bartender?
I seriously think we need to revision your idea of 'keeping a low profile'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
I'm both gender and math confused
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
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