Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
guess who just got paired up at the beer pong table with the fat girl who's nipples are hanging out...
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I cooked you Mac and cheese when I was drunk and drugged. That counts for about 4 meals. Try harder
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
Randomize
