i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
I feel like wearing underwear would just be poor planning
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I bet your mom's never met a girl who's thrown up at the presidential inauguration before though.
i let a mormon finger me. i don't ever want to be that drunk again.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
