I just accidentally stumbled into an AA meeting...I think its a sign
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Like he held up the condom afterwards, twirled it with his finger, and said "look at that load"
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
My memory of last night is a delicious blur of tits, ass, and alcohol.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
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