I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
This is drunk me apologizing to sober me in advance.. I am sprry about you're trashed house. Mom an dad will be home by 5 so get up and clean. P.s. Mike is in the closet passed out.
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
Why don’t they have healthy alcohol yet?
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