i didnt like the question options for my yahoo account..so i made up the question and it was "favorite bathroom to shit in"
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Okay you totally passed out. Ask me about the bike parking garage and the expired baby formula in the morning.
ok, I understand that your bathroom door is broken, but at least close the blinds next time you take a shit. The entire parking garage just watched you.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
I just told him that with every paper, I'd take a picture of myself with one less piece of clothing. Who say's I can't be a tutor?
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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