did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Do you remember calling me a cuntasaurus rex last night?
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
