You're completely useless in the revolution.
I have now ridden the bus with a ninja, a samurai and Jesus. Who says the bus is for losers.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
Why the fuck was I face down on the floor with you mounting me like a horse anyway? I'm so confused
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
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