He just told me his cousin just died and I look like her. Reconsidering the sex.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
The theme is smores and alcohol. Dress appropriately.
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
When I woke up this morning I swear my mouth tasted like dick and rolaids.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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