ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
No, i'm not gonna let you give me a footjob on the floor of the cheesecake factory. C'mon.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
Good news: you're over the drunk crying life phase. Bad news: now you're handy and violent. You were groping me from behind in front of the guy you like, then you put me in a headlock and swept the leg.
I’ve been home 1 day and already had sex with my ex and got a blowie from her cousin and currently I’m getting molested by a cougar at the bar!!!! Plenty to give thanks for this year!!!!
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