not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
God gave him joint rollers for hands
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Apparently I covered myself in sunscreen before I went to bed. Im just assuming that due to the fact I found an empty bottle of sunblock
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
Don't make emojis simulating eating me out
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
It’s official. I’ve hooked up with all three brothers now
You should go after Dad now
I should! He’s definitely middle age fuckable
Randomize
