I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I think I just sold a snake to a stoned teenager.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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