id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
Was having a panic attack, but I'm out of xanax. Substituting with vodka shots and breathing exercises. My therapist will be proud, yes?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
well at least now you can say you got an STD from the frontman of a band no one's heard of
fuck you.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
Randomize