I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I just witnessed my first non cocain induced sunrise in five years.
Not my cup of tea
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
Two things: Why did I wake up in a pool of blood? And am I still invited to the wedding?
No idea. And yes be here at 4
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
She introduced me as that girl Nathan was fingering
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
