Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
Went biking. Saw homeless guy beating in the park. Thought of you <3
because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
If you're trying to piece together your night, I can tell you where those tassels came from.
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
Randomize
