It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
I just saw grafitti that read "Mug The Fart Eater". Really, Memphis? That's all you've got?
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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