At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Would it be out of line to take a picture of all the earrings, rings, hairclips, and other miscellaneous girl items that I found under my bed and post it on facebook and tag all the girls that I slept with this year so they can claim their shit and get it out of my house?
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Went to 7-11 to buy condoms with the $20 I found on the ground outside Rite Aid. A good day for drug stores
Nothing says "happy birthday" like a negative pregnancy test
I have "if found please return to" written in sharpie on my arm, my uterus is rejecting everything, and I have hickies. I must actually be an 18 year old piece of shit girl instead of a responsible 23 year old
I'm bleeding and have questions
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Randomize
