sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
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you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
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When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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