Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
She's mad at me cuz I told her having a fuck buddy was too much commitment.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
Randomize
