You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
