Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I'm sorry about your car but on a brighter note I did wake up in my dorm. That's something right?
Fuck you.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
you smelled like vodka, i think that's why my grandma liked you
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Look, if a guy shows up at your house. He's short, name is Logan, has weird vertical hair, let him in, give him food, and a place to stay. He's on a ver important mission. And I am he. as he is me and we are all together. And we are the eggman, goo goo gajoob.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
Randomize
