Question for you. Are boobs and hands polarly charged, thus causing the inevitable joining of the two. If so are some breasts simply charged backwards
There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
So you know that marine I slept with, well his girlfriend just told me I was pretty, I almost feel bad for sleeping with him now...
Dont! You were just serving you country
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
Babysitting for someone you accidently sent nudies to is so fucking awkward.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
Last time he showed up for Christmas he went on and on about backpacking somewhere and getting ghonnorreah twice.
Randomize