They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
We kept trying to bring you to the hospital but you had a tantrum and kept saying you would never be Miss America
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
So my roommate just came out of the shower with a dude...guess that answers all questions as to whether or not he's gay
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
There better be alcohol at this child's birthday party. Seriously not trying to be entertained by a clown while I'm still sober.
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