I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
my credit card is covered in vodka and bad memories
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
i bet he makes cat noises to excite himself.
Randomize
