Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I need to get skinnier so that I know when pregnancy scares are real...
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
Well that's the thing. He does want to take me out... To a strip club. I see this going down a very bad road but you know I'm going to go.
Jesus horatio Christ I forgot my mittens and am considering shoving my hands down the pants of the first semi attractive man I see
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
I want to wear Christmas sweaters with you.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!