K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
Note to self. Never fart in a tanning bed
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I'm watching the Australian Open. They need to slow the fuck down. It's hard enough to follow sober and now it's just pissing me off.
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
Totally sleeping on a bloodstained mattress tonight. I love life's little adventures.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
blowjobs from left handed girls are noticably better than from righties. these are the most important things I've learned this semester
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Margaritas just taste better when they're bigger than your head
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
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