Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
So this shipmate of mine somehow managed to throw up in his back pocket.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
He purred while eating me out. HE PURRED AND I LIKED IT.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
I went out with a plan. I came home with a Brian. THIS WAS NOT PART OF THE PLAN.
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
you know it was a good night when you wake up with a medal around your neck
sober me needs to have more faith in drunk me.
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Randomize
