You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
And if you haven't kicked a pigeon you haven't started your morning right
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I love you. I would never turn you into a bear.
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Actually I learned to fire a 357 Magnum at the age of ten while on my very first period
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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