So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
I just masturbated into a dress sock. I feel fancy
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
It's like the last supper of drinking before the summer ends
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I dunno what's worse, that one guy here said he'd blow somebody for Tim Horton's right now, or that someone else looks like they want to test his sincerity.
Come get me, I'm fucking scared.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
