Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
It's going to be weird as hell when you have kids. I'll meet them and think "Hi, Did you know that I was almost your dad?"
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
PANTIES FOUND
How’d it go?
I accidentally joined a cult
So not great...
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