So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Lost my key. Fell asleep on the doorstep and got woken up by host grandma poking me with a broom.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
I just talked comic books with a cop. We high-fived as he was running my name.
Proud of you.
We discussed the legality of being a vigilante. I won.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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