I don't get calzones all look the same but taste so different
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
I hear the sound of that stray bird you rescued from the kitchen but am too busy drunkenly masturbating to feed it
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
We ended up on their roof with our pants around our ankles shotgunning beers at one point.
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
