I'm going to get drunk on champagne by myself.
Oh no wait my cat's here. Thank god for a second there I sounded really sad.
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
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all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
You chugged 6 beers in a row and then outed your boss at a party last night.
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I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
there was a goddamn geisha at house. my dick feels more cultured.
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
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