how hairy? two words: wookie tits
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
You know you're deprived when the only thing you taste while chewing gum is the 2 grams of sugar alcohol.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Youre not supposed to get arrested if your parents fly you home for christmas!
True but this has the bonus of them maybe not wanting to fly me home next year, im good with that didnt wanna go in the first place.
I still can't get over the fact that he thinks I have my life together... That has to be one of the nicest yet most sadly misled things anyone has ever said about me
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
I'm going to avoid eye contact because my old high school English teacher is not who I feel like seeing after I just had a dick in my mouth
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
I made her pull the car over 5 times to puke because she was going to fast, apparently she was only going 30mph...
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