sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
I may have pooped in your shoe. or somewhere else in your closet. its unclear.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
If you bring me a slurpee and advil I will eat you out for like an hour.
This dude. Just lost. A finger. He asked us for tape.
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
Stop confusing me with every girl you know that doesn't like sex.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
