normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Haha, just learned changing others iPhone passcodes is fun while drunk but not fun the next morning.
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
Got to the gym, getting changed, found a jello shot in my shoes.
Vodka tonic time....wish me luck!
Go for it my man. I'm saving my shit show night for tomorrow. Gonna make it a big one just to let the entire bar know why I'm single
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Woke up to the UT campus police fishing my boxers out of the university pool, guess it was a good night.
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Randomize
