it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
So how many shot glasses of coffee grounds make a pot?
You just said we could build a blanket and pillow "fuck fort." Of course I'm never leaving you.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
When your grandma invites you to a sweet girls' Valentine's dinner with your mom and sister, but you have to decline because you're trying to get two dudes to rail you at once...
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
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