I'm just sayin u wanted to sleep after ur paper. I can make u sleep
I shall celebrate this moment with a beer conveniently located in the sock drawer directly to the right of me.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
he's definitely still old enough to be your dad. even your grandfather, if you come from a line of juvenile delinquents
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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