OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
And with one simple text you can separate the men from the boys...."it's that time of the month."
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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