I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
He and I are basically the same person, except he has a glorious penis and I have glorious breasts.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
Randomize
