I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
When she asked why I felt bad I said that it may have had something to do with the gin and cold pizza I had for breakfast.... And then I reflected on what my life has become.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Your vagina needs to teach my vagina its ways.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
