i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
So some guy at the party is convinced I'm Edward Cullen. He keeps calling me "Twilight" and following me around with a stake. I'm concerned.
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
I may have broken a few toes and my face hurts. I do know that I pissed the bed so at least I've got some closure there
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
You called in. Quitter. You stayed at home naked drinking again didnt you.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
And now I'm taking a break sitting on the bathroom floor thanking god that people who eat at subway are either too classy to piss on the floor, or are still relatively sober enough to not piss on the floor before 5pm.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
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