I hate your face
So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
so im decorating easter eggs with my family and my mom is writing "Jesus is risen" and "God loves you!" on the eggs. i wrote things like "I'm naked!" and "there are drugs in these eggs!" on mine.
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
So how was your new years? Did u ride a horse at 3am in zero degree weather? Because I sure did
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
