Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I just saw a dog and thought "Hey! A goat!" Then realized it was a dog. Now I'm sad.
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
he was drinking cheap vodka with warm tap water and a packet of crystal light. if that's not an alcoholic then idk what is
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Randomize
