I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
Tune in tm morning for how to buy Plan B in a foreign country while coming down off ecstasy
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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