remember when u banged some random dude twice in the back restaurant room of the bar i work at with customers still there? and woke up with an enormous highschool-sized hickey this morning? no big deal.
im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
it's almost 8pm and i'm still hungover. at what point do i alert someone?
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Just had sex in an ice hut. What have you done with your holiday break?
My ex-fiancee UPS-ed me a sixer of tall boys, and a fifth of bourbon for christmas, from halfway across the country. What does this mean?
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
