nothing tight i'm going to stuff myself with food and alchy
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
And as far as being fat goes I just did like 20 minutes of p90x and now i'm eating frosting out of the container....
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
i told you i was taking the Metra Train, and you asked what type of drug that was.. so yes i believe you when you say you were fucked up
So I justmade it back home and was greeted to a squirrel in my dorm... Last time I let my friends rent it out for a party.
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