my grand plan for the evening is to do shots of vodka til i cant anymore
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I didn't budget in chasers this month so were chasing everything with water. Sorry.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
I think I'll shower sitting down. That seems safe.
Randomize
