i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
Eliza got arrested. What's the protocol on eating an arrested person's sandwich?
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I think I just got judged by the pizza guy. dude, you deliver fucking pizza. you need rethink YOUR life.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Woke up at my x's house. He said I talked about how much I love panda's for fourty five minutes. Then made him watch The Little Mermaid with me. Made the walk of shame infront of his mom. Things can only really go up from here.
Wait till you get home.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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