you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
Our adventure is going to pick up his pipe and weed that he ditched when he got pulled over the other day.
HOT DATE.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
Finals week...the biggest cock block since your brother threatened me with a beer bottle at the bar.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
he took a fucking pitcher of koolaid and vodka to the bath with him... i wake up from my blackout to his roomate screaming cause he spilled it and passed out in the middle of a blood red tub. she thought he killed himself. jesus christ its only the first day of break and i already regret coming home
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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